So.......I have been "chatting" with this man--not a boy or guy--from NYC. We've spoken on the phone together several times and send messages back and forth everyday for some time now. He is totally my type--6'3--215, hairy, dirty looking, smart, educated, funny and adorable. We've talked about me coming to see him in the near future. I had planned to go to NYC this summer but now that Andrew and I are talking about going somewhere else---NYC fell to the side.
However, now it is a different story. I booked my flight to NYC to see "NYC" for this weekend. Why so quickly...my Memere passed away yesterday and she was a woman who always told her children to let her grand kids be (laisse les faire--elle disait souvent) and let them make their way in the world. She never went anywhere and stayed in the city almost all her life. She will be miss and all I keep thinking is that my father is an orphan now. Though we don't really get along very much, it pains me to know that he has good memories of her from his childhood that only he has and that he will never see her again. The funeral is this week and I'll be taking several days off work. It will be great to see my huge family together but sad to see us gather again--last time was at my Pepere funeral.
That is why I'm going---she would say to me---"VAS-Y--Attends-pas que tu sois trop vieux." Plus, cheesy at it may sound--she would want me to go. Plus, NYC is a good guy and I think we'll get along really well. I'm really excited, nervous and have butterflies in my stomach at the thought of going and meeting "NYC'. I'm going with no expectations--except that we get along as well as we do in emails and talking on the phone and have fun together and laugh.
My Memere's death also makes me see that I'm trying to reach out to the ex because he has no one. I want him to know that I'm there for him as I don't want him to feel alone. If he chooses not to reach out to me--that is his choice but I'll be here when he does--not to take him back (I know that can't happen) but for him to see that not everyone from his past will leave him.
All to say, "NYC" is a wonderful guy to think about this week--a week that will hard for all my family. J'ai tellement hate!!!
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